Free guide from Solo-Dating Mastery
The restaurant, the trip, the class you'll try "when I have someone to go with." This page is for starting some version of it now. The PDF version has a fill-in table you can print.
1. Write down five things you've postponed
Then ask of each one: does this actually require a romantic partner? Some things may. Most won't. Then ask: what is the smallest version I could do now? If Italy isn't realistic this year, take a day trip. If the expensive restaurant feels intimidating, start with lunch there. The goal isn't impulsivity. It's movement.
- ____________________ Smallest version: ____________________
- ____________________ Smallest version: ____________________
- ____________________ Smallest version: ____________________
- ____________________ Smallest version: ____________________
- ____________________ Smallest version: ____________________
2. Pick your level, then go one step beyond it
Level 1, Comfortable: coffee, breakfast, a bookstore, a museum, a walk, a farmers market.
Level 2, Visible: restaurant dinner, a movie, live music, a class, wine tasting.
Level 3, Expansive: a day trip, a concert, a workshop, a weekend away.
3. Survive the first 15 minutes
- Don't hide in your phone. It disconnects you from the room. Give yourself a few minutes without it.
- Orient yourself. Find the restroom, your seat, the bar, the layout.
- Have one tiny interaction. "Is this seat taken?" or a word with the staff.
- Give it 15 minutes. Don't judge the whole experience at minute three.
- Leave if you actually hate it. You gave it a fair attempt. You can go home.
Don't wait for love to give you permission to live.
Want the whole method? Solo-Dating Mastery includes the 13-part Solo-Dating Mastery Audit. See the book.